Nearly Orthodox
for now...
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The conversation was something like this: me: “I want to go to church…someplace….on Easter.” him: “okay. where?” me: “doesn’t matter….this year.” him: “this year?” me: “next year it matters to me.” him: “will you be Orthodox then?” me: “yes.” him: “alright.” This is the hardest part of the journey so far, harder than the struggles in prayer and fasting, harder than figuring out how to parent my children during liturgy (which I…
Nearly Orthodox
word and letter...
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Being a vegan may actually cure my vegetarianism. I’m not a strict vegetarian, mind you. I don’t keep to it because of lofty reasons or even purely health reasons. I usually avoid meat because frankly, I feel like crap after I eat beef and pork. So it’s been, I don’t know, like 5 years since I ate beef or pork. I generally do eat fish a few times a month and I’ll…
Nearly Orthodox
annunciation...
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Today being the Feast of the Annunciation I attended Divine Liturgy. I ducked out early. Don’t tell my priest. It had little to do with the Liturgy and more to do with the fact that sneaking away while my 13 year old babysits on a “(home)school” day always gives me pause. As I drove away though I did feel some real loss. I wondered if I will ever get used to the…
Nearly Orthodox
spiritual mother...
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So I need a sponsor. I’ve been thinking about this for a few weeks now, ever since I stumbled upon my original baptismal certificate while I was looking for a credit card I’d misplaced before my move. Isn’t that always the way, the metaphor…stumbling upon something while looking for something else? Or maybe it’s just me…stumbling through things, everything reminding me of something else, eventually it all gets done somehow. At any…
Nearly Orthodox
follow...
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When my husband and I got married I was not attending church, at all, really. I didn’t feel a loss in this at the time. I still very much considered myself a Christian mainly because I still fully believed the Creed. I had an understanding with God, liked Him a whole lot, we talked every day, many times in fact. I believed in the reality of the Wonderful Counselor. I believed Jesus…
Nearly Orthodox
family: life giver
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I’ve been avoiding His gaze. I treat Him as though He is just another picture on the wall. He is just above the Theotokos on my altar at home which makes it hard to avoid Him and yet I manage it somehow. The Theotokos of Vladimir gives great comfort, sweet mother. Sometimes when I walk by I focus in on her and even remove her from the altar for us to have…
Nearly Orthodox
categories...
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It may be alright with me that I’ll always struggle. I may be the kind of person who needs to struggle. I look at my “category” list here on this blog and I realize the choices I’ve made there are deliberate, things that describe me and that frankly, I want to describe me. doctrine family fasting growing up catholic mystic practice struggle I want doctrine or at least I want a little…
Nearly Orthodox
sophia...
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Naming means a great deal to me. I remember that the best part of having dolls as a girl was that I got to name them. Every time I took up an instrument I named it. There is some power, some deep meaning that is conveyed in naming. When I think about my name I’m moved to a number of memories and emotion. I hated that when I told people my name…
Nearly Orthodox
awkward...
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I attended Divine Liturgy this morning, finally. I was comforted that Vespers has prepared me for some of the ritual, the language, the feel and the rhythm. I was thankful to find the parallels I’d been expecting from my Catholic roots. The reading of the Word, the prayers of the Faithful, the blessing of the Mysteries, the “Take and eat…” It was nice to feel some connection already there, not everything was…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
"Spiritual But Not Religious" and the Path to God
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I sometimes encounter folks who tell me that they are “spiritual but not religious” (SBNR). I wish I asked more often what exactly that is supposed to mean, though I am usually held back from asking by a strong suspicion that such a statement is not meant to undergo any sort of scrutiny. But what does it mean, anyway? This post is a reflection…
Nearly Orthodox
stations of the cross...
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Growing up Catholic we would attend church every wednesday. During Lent we would go to church on Wednesday mornings but instead of our regular service we would start with Ash Wednesday to kick off the season. Then, each Wednesday after that until Easter we would have the Stations of the Cross, the way of Sorrows. It was a telling of the Passion, visual and visceral. I felt it, deeply in me. I…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
The Salvation of All
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A friend recently weighed in on a theological question that made the New York Times. One should always be suspicious when newspapers start talking about theology, because, well, newspapers seldom know anything about it. The piece of theology essentially goes this way: There really is no hell, and God is too loving to send anyone there. How could God possibly be so cruel to…
Nearly Orthodox
beginning clean...
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The absence of Ash Wednesday offers some grief for me. I like those ashes, damn it. I liked the feeling of having them placed on my forehead, I liked wearing them out into the world. I like this. I suppose what I liked most was the reminder of being ash. The deeper thought and feeling there being the very transient nature of the body, the eternal nature of the spirit, the real…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
Aslan is on the move
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The Sunday of Forgiveness, March 6, 2011 In the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, one God. Amen. “They say Aslan is on the move.” With these whispered words, the seventh chapter of the allegorically Christian novel by C. S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, introduces the character of Aslan. “Aslan is on the…
Nearly Orthodox
Great Lent...
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I’m meant to attend a service tomorrow, the last day before the start of Great Lent. I’ve been emailing with a new friend, someone who strikes me as kindred in some very good and holy ways…artist, mother, wife, outspoken and funny… And I wake up today with a raging headcold. There are no accidents, you know. This was well planned by my body, extremely well planned. I’m not saying that I don’t…
Nearly Orthodox
tongues...
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I’m back on the Jesus Prayer most of the day. Constantly…moving my lips along with the words, silent on my breath…when I’m driving, when I’m typing, when I’m trying hardest not to lose my temper or lapse into future living instead of the now…present tense… The Jesus Prayer is always present tense. Today, sitting alone while the kids were all out playing I clung to my quiet house, my warm coffee cup,…
Nearly Orthodox
pause...
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I ran into a wall this weekend and now I don’t want to pray. I was speaking to someone recently about my journey. She was interested in it as well and I think she had hoped I would be able to enlighten her on some of the finer points…which is crazy…because I know so little. I’m a terrible spokesperson for Orthodoxy. The most I can say is that I feel more stirred…
Nearly Orthodox
remedial...
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cross posted with http://www.mrsmetaphor.com remedial… Where matters of faith are concerned everything is remedial. I have become a pilgrim of sorts in the last six months on a road I never imagined myself taking. The destination is not new. I can easily say that meeting God on a regular basis has been the destination that I look toward. I’m all about it. In my best moments I suppose I thought I was…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
Podcasts page created
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In an effort to put all (or most) of my podcasting work into one navigable place, I’ve created a podcasts page on the Roads from Emmaus website. It not only has the full Orthodoxy and Heterodoxy series, but also the various series and talks I’ve done for Roads from Emmaus, as well as some talks I’ve done as part of other series. It’s grouped…
Nearly Orthodox
fits and starts...
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Perhaps that is what this journey will always be, fits and starts. For someone who likes to think of herself as “even keel” this whole fits and starts business is frustrating in it’s utter inefficiency. Can’t I just speak whatever words are necessary, have a priest slap some oil on my head and be done with it? Why does this have to be complicated? I’m complicated…but not really. I dreamt last night…
Nearly Orthodox
church...
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It’s easy to skip church right now. I confess, it’s possible I’ve used our relationships with the people at the Presbyterian church as an excuse to not attend Divine Litury up to now. I’m so conflicted on Sunday mornings. I wring my hands and wander around the house just looking for someone to tell me to go or tell me to stay home or tell me to leave everyone at home and…
Nearly Orthodox
hungry...
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Bad news for the potential pill popper part of me, the one who had hoped that one day the blue pill would finally dispense me from the hard work of faith… I’ve picked up a book by Alexander Schmemann and the first line reads, “Man is what he eats…” No matter where I turn I find I am facing this very thought. I am a function not merely of what I say…
Nearly Orthodox
fear and hope...
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I’m convinced that, for me, being an introvert is not a function of having low self esteem. I actually think highly of myself…perhaps a little too highly based upon some recent prayer revelation, actually. Being an introvert is a function of understanding most things that appear ordinary and routine as having some deep mystery and then making room for that mystery in my opinion. This brings me to some thoughts I had…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
Byzantine, Texas interview
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Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
Orthodoxy and Heterodoxy due out in May 2011
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Nearly Orthodox
winter people....
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Every picture of the saints shows grief. Some may read the looks on their faces as anger or seriousness…I see sadness everywhere I look. I see grief. I see the deep grief of the world on their shoulders. I don’t only see it, I recognize it in me. It reaches out of the icons and into me, hands pulling hard on my heart. I can feel this, visceral and vibrant. I worry…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
New Facebook page
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