Nearly Orthodox
live...
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Fr G. spoke about the “nous” last week. I know this word already. He spoke of “nous” as being the “eye of the soul.”  This is the metaphor I’ve heard employed in the past.  Everyone who has given that description has explained that it is incredibly lacking. What the “nous” represents to us is so much more which is why the loss of it’s meaning in our lives is so great. We’ve…
Praying in the Rain
Singing
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Sometimes I sing to my wife. I don’t sing very well, so I don’t sing very long. Just a line or two. I make up the words. Sometimes I have to sing, otherwise my wife forgets how much I love her. My mindless actions and strayings into grumpy old manhood often communicate just the opposite. It is easy for her to forget. It’s easy for her to be overwhelmed by my dirty…
Glory to God for All Things
Suffering in a One-Storey Universe
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A comment on a previous post which mentioned the Biblical and patristic teaching that we should “give thanks to God for all things” has been an occasion for personal reflection – the substance of which forms this present post. For those who wrestle with the inherent difficulties of giving thanks for all things – I hope this reflection will be helpful. The comment which occasioned these thoughts: ..I think the lines separating…
Nearly Orthodox
vespers...
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I attended Vespers at the Greek Orthodox church last night for the first time. I felt as I expected…awkward, confused, grateful, tired, did I mention awkward? I wanted it to be darker in there. It was so light. I wanted to hide, very badly. It was interesting because just as I began to realize no one was watching me, judging my feeble attempts to understand hand motions and timing and listening, just…
Nearly Orthodox
long distance running...
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I’m not a runner. I mean, I try but I’m just not really built for it. I’m more the flexibility and strength training kind of body. Running is something I do because it has merit for me and because I’m able to do it most places I go. I can take that practice with me wherever I go. It becomes a kind of prayer in that way. A friend mentioned a…
Praying in the Rain
Michael Henchard and Repentance: Ten Minutes Too Late
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“But the proposal came ten minutes too late.” These are some of the saddest words in The Mayor of Casterbridge. Michael Henchard, immediately after convincing his stepdaughter (whom he believes is his biological daughter) to take his name, finds out that she is indeed the daughter of the sailor, the man to whom he had sold his wife 19 year before. His Elizabeth-Jane had died three months after they separated, and Susan…
Nearly Orthodox
thirsting for God...
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I’ve begun a book suggested by a twitter friend called “Thirsting for God in a Land of Shallow Wells” by Matthew Gallatin. Ok so here’s the thing.  I’m only in the first section of the book, written as memoir he has an interesting story. At this point he’s been through the denominational wringer so to speak. This is a man in search of “truth.”  It’s funny, I have never sought “truth.” I…
Glory to God for All Things
Whom God Would Have Us Be
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When man stands before the throne of God, when he has fulfilled all that God has given him to fulfill, when all sins are forgiven, all joy restored, then there is nothing else for him to do but to give thanks. Eucharist (thanksgiving) is the state of perfect man. Eucharist is the life of paradise. Eucharist is the only full and real response of man to God’s creation, redemption and gift of…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
The Golden Mountain
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Glory to God for All Things
Falling Short
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I fail. We fail. It’s just how things are. It is not a conspiracy or the judgment of God or a universe arrayed against us – we simply fall short. At times falling short is nothing less than embarrassing. This is especially so if we have raised our own expectations as well as the expectations of others. I do not measure up to my own expectations much less to those of others.…
Praying in the Rain
Michael Henchard and A Dog That Kills Chickens
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I just chased a stray dog out of my chicken and goose run. It killed my beautiful hybrid rooster from good laying stock and chased all of the hens out over or under the fences onto the street and into the ditch in front of the house. They’ll slowly make their way back as they get hungry, I hope. I had a hard time chasing off the dog. I felt sorry for…
Nearly Orthodox
hot buttons...
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I’m making my list. I’m checking it twice…three times…maybe four. As I’m reading about the tradition I am thinking over and over about the reasons I have turned away from the “church” in this country. The odd thing is that I’m not REMINDED of this when I’m reading it. It’s not as if I’m reading the doctrine and think, “oh hey THAT is why I shun organized religion…”  Not at all. I’m…
Praying in the Rain
Marriage and Baptism
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In the old days, before divorce was a convenient option, it was not uncommon for a couple to be married, perhaps for many years, and yet not to know each other very well. Marriage is a fact of life, knowing one another, however, is a matter growing relationship. What a shame it is for a man and woman to be married for many years and perhaps raise a family together, but still…
Nearly Orthodox
matins...
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It turns out that the church I’m courting does have a matins service during the week…so, there’s that. I’ve been looking for a way to do a kind of location scout and maybe this is the way to do it.  I’m told that there are not many seats in the typical orthodox sanctuary…most people stand during the service. This thought lends me some angst. I wish I could just be invisible until…
Praying in the Rain
The Mayor of Casterbridge 1
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The Mayor of Caterbridge begins with a man selling his wife and daughter for five guineas. The man was drunk at the time, and he really didn’t expect that someone would actually buy her. He was only tormenting his wife, as he occasionally did when he had had too much rum not to speak his wishes out loud. Michael Henchard had married young, making good wages as a hay trusser; but the…
Praying in the Rain
Grandkids and Thomas Hardy (Not Related)
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May you see your children’s children (Psa. 127:6). As some of you know, I have been busy this week with my children’s children. It has been a wonderful and busy week. The week started out with two of my daughters and grandchildren joining me for Saturday morning matins. We began matins by running back and forth across the church nave: “One, two, three, go!” The room was cold and this both warmed…
Nearly Orthodox
hurry...
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I’m always in a hurry. I hate to wait. That whole patience thing is a train I can hear whistling in the distance but can never seem to catch. I watch it going by on a trestle far above my head and think, “well, that’s really majestic and beautiful….and unreachable. I wonder where it’s going.” This is how I feel about Orthodoxy today.  I just can’t seem to get to a service.…
Praying in the Rain
Our Mutual Friend (Podcast Transcript)
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I was eager to reread Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens; I remembered it as being my favorite Dickens novel. However, 100 pages into this 800 page story, I was having a hard time remembering why I liked this novel so much. Our Mutual Friend is not one of Dickens’ popular novels, and certainly it is not one of his best. It is his last full novel, completed in 1865. Like…
Nearly Orthodox
people...
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I’m an introvert. Most people who know me will say I hide that well and I guess I do. I’m an extroverted introvert. I can be outgoing-ish and I can handle myself in a group of people but I’m completely worn out for meeting people.  I don’t mind being IN FRONT of a large group, I’m a performer. Being IN a large group is hard for me. I’m afraid of a number…
Nearly Orthodox
first steps...
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I’ve attended my first Orthodoxy 101 class. I know that I already know most of this. I am at once encouraged and discouraged. I look around the small table of people sitting and listening. The priest, Father G is very kind. He’s young, passionate about the faith.  He keeps stopping in his instruction, asking for questions. We all stare blankly. There is a sweet young couple sitting next to me, they identify…
Nearly Orthodox
long time coming...
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I’ve been considering a return to ancient traditon for a long time now. I was raised Roman Catholic, left that faith when I was in college and then while I kept my belief and love of God and the person of Jesus I just never found a home. I have a family now. They are, I recognize, a brood of little prophets. I have a husband who is strong in theologian leanings…
Glory to God for All Things
Believe It or Not
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I have to confess as I begin this post that I find myself reaching for words. I reach for words to say something I know, but which is hard to express. To believe the truth is not the same thing as having a correct opinion – indeed the two have almost nothing to do with one another. And this is a great difficulty – for most of the things that we think of ourselves as…
Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick
Text
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Whenever I have not read The Lord of the Rings for some time, I feel as though I am a long way from home. I try (but sometimes fail) to read it annually. And yet I have all these books around that I bought but just haven’t gotten around to reading yet. They’re good books, mind you. Being a geek who married a geek,…
Praying in the Rain
Love Is The Best Teacher (Dickens Rabbit Trail)
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“Love is in all things a most wonderful teacher.” Bella is now knitting baby clothes, and Dickens comments on how well she is adapting to sewing and knitting small things. Her love for her husband and the baby in her womb is the most wonderful teacher. If you will permit me to take this line out of context, I think this would make a good motto for everyone who teaches. When…
Praying in the Rain
God's Mercy
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Praying in the Rain
Our Mutual Friend part 2: Bella and Love Breaks Through
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As I am rereading Our Mutual Friend, I realize that part of the reason why I remember this novel so fondly is that I relate deeply to two characters. The two characters are Bella and her father, the “Cherub.” I relate to Bella because I understand her struggles with the unfairness of the world, the pull of greed and the confusion of not knowing herself. And like Bella, love made the difference…
Glory to God for All Things
The Boldness of Prayer
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In the Liturgy of St. John Chrysostom, at the end of the litany that precedes the Lord’s Prayer, the priest intones: And make us worthy, O Master, that with boldness and without condemnation, we may dare to call upon Thee, the heavenly God, as Father, and to say: Our Father… It is a phrase that relfects Hebrews 4:15-16: For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling…
